April Fools....NOT

This month has seriously blown by fast. In less than three months I will be graduating and I'm anticipating it more and more. I'm just not happy with Bayside. Although thats where I've met some of the most amazing people in my life that I cannot live without, and pretty much saved me [literally]. I'm ready to move on [even though this won't be the same later on]. I really think I screwed up, though its not as much as many other people, I am not satisfied with myself and all the things that I've done. This day has been so depressing mainly because of everything I feel that I haven't accomplished.
I really regret not working hard in freshman and sophomore year. Good grades are really important to me now and I'm working 5x as hard as I've ever worked before and yet it doesn't seem like I'm progressing. The cumulative average on my transcrip inches up really slowly and it's really stressing me out.
I really hate all the drama and just the people in high school. I don't want to sound hypocritical but i find a lot of people really annoying now a days. These freshmen and middle schoolers are all about whos dating who, whos screwing who, and peopel who believe they have to constantly prove themselves to be worth something when all theyre doing is making themselves look stupid. I'm sick of seeing all this drama and taking thhe damn bus to school every 6 in the morning. Especially this one girl who has her fcking iphone out everyday and talking until her mouth is dry, its like she cannot shut up even if her life depended on it. I'm glad won't be dealing with this as soon as I start taking the train to school =].
Another goal I had was to be more outgoing, yet I find myself isolating myself more than ever. Maybe I am just a hostile bitter asian chick that is just meant to be alone. I get freaked out in large crowds and I find it hard to really put myself out there and just be open to everyone. I am who I am and theres probably nothing that can change that, even though its something I don't really like.
In the end, no matter what other people say, I AM THE FOOL. This has been one of the most depressing days since 8th grade. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better one.
Peace